The New Monogamy: Desire and Fidelity in the New Millennium

Therapists today report seeing an increasing number of committed couples, one or both of whom have outside sexual partners. Often neither partner wants to separate and both appear willing to negotiate monogamy in new ways, redefining fidelity. Are these couples just fooling themselves by thinking that they can have both genuine intimacy and outside sexual partners, or do we need to reexamine some of our attitudes about infidelity and relationship boundaries? Can we help couples survive affairs without the demoralization that comes with infidelity? In this workshop, we'll discuss monogamy from a multicultural, historical, nonjudgmental perspective, reviewing the history of open marriage and polyamory, along with currently evolving rules about sexuality in marriage. We'll explore the continuum of monogamy that most couples fall on, which isn't the black and white scale that's considered normal. You'll learn how to talk with couples about the meaning of an affair in a way that can provide an opportunity for them to end their "old" marriage and begin a new, revitalized marriage.